3 December 2020 Maggie Smith I tend to head for what’s amusing because a lot of things aren’t happy. But usually you can find a funny side to practically anything.
3 December 2020 Shawn Johnson It sounds funny, but the 2008 Olympics were something that just kind of happened, and I was lucky they came at a point when I was uninjured and well prepared. As a gymnast, you can’t ask for much more.
3 December 2020 Jimmy Fallon The one thing you shouldn’t do is try to tell a cab driver how to get somewhere.
3 December 2020 Dave Barry It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person’s plate.
3 December 2020 Jimmy Durante My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe.
3 December 2020 Kellan Lutz See, I don’t really go after girls. Most of the girlfriends I’ve had have come after me. So it’s really funny when girls get offended because I don’t hit on them.
3 December 2020 Scott Thompson When you are not treated seriously, you develop comically. Its sense of oneself is so fractured and fragile that it’s like the picked-on kid who has to become funny.
3 December 2020 Paul Lynde I don’t know who the hell Paul Lynde is, or why he’s funny, and I prefer it to be a mystery to me.
3 December 2020 Caroline Rhea Someone told me that when they go to Vermont, they feel like they’re home. I’m that way at Saks.
3 December 2020 Sugar Ray Leonard In Italy, I had an Afro, and a lot of the kids came up and felt my hair. It really was funny. I wish I had understood Italian.
3 December 2020 H. L. Mencken It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man.
3 December 2020 Mo Rocca The most important thing is to write material that YOU think is funny. If you don’t think it’s funny, but you’re convinced that other people will think it is, well they won’t.
3 December 2020 Olivia Munn Jon Stewart hires people that he thinks are funny. That’s it. That’s the only requirement.
3 December 2020 Will Rogers I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they now do.
3 December 2020 Joan Rivers I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
3 December 2020 Jean Dujardin I like the hot-cold, the sugar-salt, being able to play over-the-top and dramatic things – in the same film. Just as in my life, I can be very funny and at other times almost extinguished.
3 December 2020 Tina Yothers They did that little thing on South Park, and they mentioned my name and had a character of me judging a Halloween contest. It was really funny.That made me the coolest aunt on earth.
3 December 2020 Robert Byrne Until you walk a mile in another man’s moccasins you can’t imagine the smell.
3 December 2020 Ted Allen Queer Eye for the Straight Guy is a form of service journalism. To be successful, I think it has to be a combination of a good story, it has to be funny, and it also needs to be packed with useful information.
3 December 2020 Fanny Brice Being a funny person does an awful lot of things to you. You feel that you mustn’t get serious with people. They don’t expect it from you, and they don’t want to see it. You’re not entitled to be serious, you’re a clown.
3 December 2020 Bill Cosby Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.
3 December 2020 Marlon Wayans Comedy clubs can be brutal. Those people are for real, and if you aren’t funny, they aren’t laughing. They don’t care who you are.
